the red umbrella.

amongst all those people who simply try to get by, gripping onto their black umbrellas. i want to be someone more than that. i want to stand out from the crowd. and be the different one. doesnt have to be life-changing. i just want to leave a mark. be someone people will remember. without using my history, or my self-assumed inadequacies, or my differences, as an excuse. of what i cannot do. or what i am afraid to do.

truthfully, i dont think i am good enough. and i am really really scared, especially right now. but i want to tell myself that i will weather the storm with my red umbrella. an umbrella to say that i am ready to face whatever it is. red–for me to stand out among the rest. red–to shelter my head with colour. red–signifying bright strong colours. red–symbolising blood, courage and bravery. red–reminding me of ralph waldo emerson’s words that “courage is not the absence of fear; courage is knowing that something is more important than fear.”

yes, amongst the sea of black umbrellas, i want to be the one holding on to the red umbrella. or, ar least, i hope i will be.